Your Soul vs. Love

toi moi nous,you,me,us

Should we let go of our dreams?

Our dreams are deeply rooted in our skin and travel through our blood. I believe they are born in our hearts and can eventually reach our brain if you let it happen.

We all have dreams, which may have been built during our childhood. In my opinion, no one should occult his yawning thoughts. If we have the capability to think, analyze, over think, compare, explore, introspect, it means we need to focus more to get a sense out of what we are experiencing.

For instance, if one of your thought triggers compassion for humankind, leading to confusion and anxiety about our future on this planet, it is fairly easy to just put it aside and keep on doing what you are doing. Nevertheless, it is part of who you are and you should listen to yourself. The key to finding yourself and knowing what you want to become during this short journey called life, is an equation of several thoughts, feelings and breakthroughs. Some people tend to get a glimpse of it during their sleep, remembering their nightmares or beautiful dreams while others prefer to meditate to get in touch with their inner minds. It’s not complicated it only takes curiosity and willingness.

We believe we do not have time. We think it’s a waste of energy and probably a hassle. What if it leads to a complete change of our way of thinking after we try to discover more about ourselves? What if we have to change everything? The relationships we’ve built, the job we worked hard for and the security? It’s not a struggle. Searching for our SOUL is a commitment, it’s possible and it will bring you somewhere called HOME.

You cannot build your home on lies.

The downside is we live in an over exposed environment where the quest to happiness is on everyone’s agenda. How can I be happier? Where can I get this pair of shoes for a cheaper price? Who can I choose to marry? We have so many choices, so many opportunities that it’s impossible for us to maintain a healthy rhythm, a harmonious step plan. We think we know what our dreams are, that we are doing everything to pursue them while believing it will obviously bring us joy and happiness forever.

It’s time to wake up! Motivating oneself to be happier is a great source of strength. However, decoding our dreams is a different path.

I will tell you how it worked for me. I’m still working on pursuing my passion and my goals are set more or less. I feel completely FREE. I’m lucky enough to have very supportive parents, the most amazing friends and an ability to adapt quickly to any given situation. I also enjoy random encounters, discovering new countries and I possess a strong creative sense. While these specific characteristics make me a great candidate for this fight for my dreams, it certainly doesn’t mean I will be happy in the end.

Dreamers, risk takers, adventurers, adrenaline seekers, creative minds, philosophers and so on, are not the happiest people on this planet.

If you recognize yourself in the description above, it doesn’t mean you can’t be serene and peaceful, I’m just pointing out the difference between seeking your dreams and finding happiness. When most people think they are usually linked, I can tell you it isn’t always true.

Take my background and my own experience for example. I was engaged a few times, I had great loving relationships with perfect men. I am not afraid to commit whatsoever and would love to build a family. For some reason, each time I am close to truly committing, I get an electroshock reminding me I’m letting go of MY dreams. Because let’s face it, dreams are personal. They are our own creations, private, selfish and intimate, how on earth could you fully concentrate on that accomplishment while committing to someone else’s dreams? When you get married, you give a part of your soul away. Isn’t it what they all say? Isn’t it what poems and love songs talk about? Mariah Carrey giving “her all” being one example and the word “soul mate”, another perfect illustration. The risk takers are those like me, who prefer to selfishly keep their soul, rather than maybe feeling serene and happy. Hence, when choosing the most risky path, you will get an intense thrill and goose bumps along the way. You will live for yourself and sense the freedom and fullfilment in your veins.

At this point, if you have the choice, which path will you take?

As an optimist, I am certain there is a different concept out there, which embodies the soul mate figure in a different form. In my beliefs, strong and sensitive, he has a driven open-minded spirit, he knows how I feel and he has been through similar situations. If I’m lucky enough to meet him, not only will he elevate ME but he will also show me it’s perfectly okay to fall in love without losing my soul. He will support me and back me because he comprehends my deepest thoughts without asking. As if it were pure magic, the same will apply for him. We will experience what we commonly call a deep CONNECTION. It’s possible to find and surprisingly it’s the only time your two paths will become one. Because your dreams become reality and you will have finally won the battle against yourself. You will experience a harmony between stability and movement, between love and passion and the most important of all, between your ego and the world.

Good luck my friends.

Namaste

Yvonne Pearl

Dream Piece …

Fashion trends are always cycles. Do not give your clothes away! Okay, if you do not have enough space in your closet please try to store them or put them in a box in your basement.One day, trust me, you’ll be happy I said that. Your daughter maybe will be happy too or even granddaughter.

The thing about Fashion I learnt and I keep on experiencing, is that what makes you fall in love with a piece and live a lifetime relationship, is the fact that this particular piece is UNIQUE. You never see it on anyone, and people just ask you where you got it. I can imagine that if you buy something at a Vintage store, you’re going to think it’s unique and you’ll be able to reach this point of “perfect” piece experience. It really depends. I’ve made a lot of mistakes in the past with Vintage stuff (TG it’s cheap). You buy it and then you tell yourself that it’s old and maybe doesn’t really fit or is just not what you wanted to get but couldn’t afford the dream piece in the Boutique next door. If that is your state of mind, please do not buy anything to make you feel better. Just try to put money aside and get what you truly and deeply want! Buying in quantity can be great but it’s generally a way to feel relieved  that you didn’t spend it on one piece you’ll wear once and that you just cannot afford right now.

Then comes the big analysis of whether or not the piece you’re dreaming about is a “One of kind”, “never gonna find again”, “will make my life so much easier” PIECE. It can be answered asking yourself simple questions:

Step 1: Do I already own a similar piece? (example a small black clutch)

If your answer is YES you’re done here (except if you have so much money and just want to have the most awesome closet without even knowing what and when to wear something since you don’t even know that you have it (mm I’m a bit exaggerating here)

Step 2: Do I need this piece? (example for clutches: are you going to go to many events soon? Weddings, nice dinner parties?) I mean if you’re going out more often during the day, you don’t really need a new clutch)

Step 3: Do you like the material? Is the colour easy to combine with your usual outfits? That’s the most important thing. If you saw it in a magazine and a girl was wearing it at the Oscars for instance, the way she wears it is maybe going to be slightly different from your style (I’m using maybe because you could have this lifestyle, do not know who is reading my blog …)

Step 4: Is it something I can afford right now? Okay here, comes the boring, technical question we all hate. Yes we’re dying for this new piece and we do not care how much money is left on our accounts. I’d always think about how my Dad raised me when I ask myself this particular question. I feel amazing that Step 1 to 3 was successful and then comes this stupid financial issue that’s going to ruin my dream (obviously this is categorized in the superficial dreams, not really a dream I want to accomplish) It would be sad if our dreams would be only fashion ones! But you know what, being superficial from time to time is relaxing. You can finally turn OFF your brain and turn ON only your eyes!

Anyways, I found a solution for this financial issue (when it happens): Try to convince your Mom, your Boyfriend, sister … that’s the piece you’ve been looking for this entire Fashion Season (this is useful when your bday is not so far away, Hanukkah, Christmas …) always a great way to either get it as “the most amazing present” or to get a little help (you could share the cost for instance and still be a gift) Just talk about it excessively saying how good it will look with this or that, and these people will get a sense of your love and attachment to this dream piece. Trust me, this technic usually works, everyone is happy at the end.

Step 5/Alternative: Wait … Find it online: http://www.vestiairecollective.com/ (that’s the amazing website I used in France, but it’s worldwide now)

Bon Shopping