Happy Gift Surprises

To make someone you love happy is easy
Follow these steps and gift advice

The impact of saying thank you

~ yvonnepearl ~ Leave a comment

I know for a fact that some individuals have this tendency to forget these two simple words. Thanking someone does not take any huge effort. It is automatic for some and difficult for others. I’ve always thought it came from childhood and the way we were brought up. Should we expect to hear it? If we do and the other person stays silent is this viewed as a denigration for us. Do we feel hurt?

The issue here is not that we feel hurt. It’s more that we feel we have stronger values than this other individual. We do not understand why he would not say thank you for a favor we did for him. Are we looking to be thanked each time we do something for someone else? Is that why we do it? Where the motivation comes from? Or is it just an act of altruism? Wanting to please others without receiving. What if we lived that way? Wouldn’t everything be easier?

I realized many fights between couples or friends can be triggered because of a similar situation. Buying a gift for someone and feeling that he or she does not appreciate it that much, surprising someone who does not care for that … C’est la vie.

Here in LA and throughout the US, people seem more polite than in Europe. You even feel awkward at some times when they smile too much or keep on saying nice things to you. In LA people are nice but not too demonstrative (like Midwesterners). I had to get accommodated to this “hey how’s it going?”, “how are you today”, “have a great Monday”, “have a great one” … Some of these nice thoughts were even blurry at first. I finally understood and I’m still trying to do the same. For it to become spontaneous it takes time. The French/Parisian cold attitude gets a while to get rid of. Even though I was never this kind of person in Paris, it just is part of my skin who I am and what I am so used to.

The only problem with these “thank-yous” is that you get so affected if it’s the people you love who forget to say these two very simple words. They are the only one that truly matter to you and for this reason you are expecting a kind word from them. They seem to forget it or just believe we do not care anymore. It is the most important thing we need. THANK YOU is not hard, it should not be a battle, it should just be like breathing … Start making others happy it doesn’t cost anything, it doesn’t take any energy.

Remember this first advice: SAY THANK YOU!

Old time “Games”

~ yvonnepearl ~ Leave a comment

Do you remember when you used to play games with your family or friends? Wasn’t it just a great time? Monopoly, scrabble, candyland, Cluedo, snake and ladders, operation (also known as Dr Maboul in French)  … What happened? Why did we stopped playing?

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Our society has changed and I guess that we prefer watching series, playing games on our phones, chatting on Facebook and so on. If you went at a friend’s house and if he’d ask you: “Do you want to play Monopoly?” wouldn’t you be surprised? Children are not even playing games anymore. It has to stop! I learnt so much from these games. I learnt how to be careful and how to come up with strategies, I learnt that being good is not enough you also need Luck, I learnt that you cannot get angry if you lose, failure is just the first step to success in many cases. I took morality lessons especially playing snake and ladders, where a player’s progression up the board represented a life journey complicated by virtues (ladders) and vices (snakes).

Games … We still play them. In fact, we play them everyday. With our colleagues, siblings, lovers. We have to admit that it’s difficult to live thinking that everyone is playing. How do we play? I guess we just roll the dice to see what comes next, we step into something and deeply believe in it. We try and try again until it works or, … it doesn’t. We let go, we come back we feel trapped and we wait for our turn. We wait a long period of time, we pretend, until someone else loses. Are we bad people? No, we are just human beings, we expect and we fight.

When NYC was in the dark, some friends of mine told me that they played games to pass the time. Turns out they had a great time! However, will they play again? Will they get together to play, share,fight, laugh and learn like old time?

I truly believe we should get our youth back and start playing these games. Throw Games parties with friends and have a blast. In order for it to happen, just think about easy holiday gifts that you could give or receive such as Cluedo, Monopoly and every other game we played that are etch forever in our memories.

I thank my sister and Isabelle for these cherished moments.

Dream Piece …

~ yvonnepearl ~ Leave a comment

Fashion trends are always cycles. Do not give your clothes away! Okay, if you do not have enough space in your closet please try to store them or put them in a box in your basement.One day, trust me, you’ll be happy I said that. Your daughter maybe will be happy too or even granddaughter.

The thing about Fashion I learnt and I keep on experiencing, is that what makes you fall in love with a piece and live a lifetime relationship, is the fact that this particular piece is UNIQUE. You never see it on anyone, and people just ask you where you got it. I can imagine that if you buy something at a Vintage store, you’re going to think it’s unique and you’ll be able to reach this point of “perfect” piece experience. It really depends. I’ve made a lot of mistakes in the past with Vintage stuff (TG it’s cheap). You buy it and then you tell yourself that it’s old and maybe doesn’t really fit or is just not what you wanted to get but couldn’t afford the dream piece in the Boutique next door. If that is your state of mind, please do not buy anything to make you feel better. Just try to put money aside and get what you truly and deeply want! Buying in quantity can be great but it’s generally a way to feel relieved  that you didn’t spend it on one piece you’ll wear once and that you just cannot afford right now.

Then comes the big analysis of whether or not the piece you’re dreaming about is a “One of kind”, “never gonna find again”, “will make my life so much easier” PIECE. It can be answered asking yourself simple questions:

Step 1: Do I already own a similar piece? (example a small black clutch)

If your answer is YES you’re done here (except if you have so much money and just want to have the most awesome closet without even knowing what and when to wear something since you don’t even know that you have it (mm I’m a bit exaggerating here)

Step 2: Do I need this piece? (example for clutches: are you going to go to many events soon? Weddings, nice dinner parties?) I mean if you’re going out more often during the day, you don’t really need a new clutch)

Step 3: Do you like the material? Is the colour easy to combine with your usual outfits? That’s the most important thing. If you saw it in a magazine and a girl was wearing it at the Oscars for instance, the way she wears it is maybe going to be slightly different from your style (I’m using maybe because you could have this lifestyle, do not know who is reading my blog …)

Step 4: Is it something I can afford right now? Okay here, comes the boring, technical question we all hate. Yes we’re dying for this new piece and we do not care how much money is left on our accounts. I’d always think about how my Dad raised me when I ask myself this particular question. I feel amazing that Step 1 to 3 was successful and then comes this stupid financial issue that’s going to ruin my dream (obviously this is categorized in the superficial dreams, not really a dream I want to accomplish) It would be sad if our dreams would be only fashion ones! But you know what, being superficial from time to time is relaxing. You can finally turn OFF your brain and turn ON only your eyes!

Anyways, I found a solution for this financial issue (when it happens): Try to convince your Mom, your Boyfriend, sister … that’s the piece you’ve been looking for this entire Fashion Season (this is useful when your bday is not so far away, Hanukkah, Christmas …) always a great way to either get it as “the most amazing present” or to get a little help (you could share the cost for instance and still be a gift) Just talk about it excessively saying how good it will look with this or that, and these people will get a sense of your love and attachment to this dream piece. Trust me, this technic usually works, everyone is happy at the end.

Step 5/Alternative: Wait … Find it online: http://www.vestiairecollective.com/ (that’s the amazing website I used in France, but it’s worldwide now)

Bon Shopping

 

 

Magazine Subscriptions

~ yvonnepearl ~ Leave a comment

Okay so it’s a friend’s birthday soon and I was out of ideas. Hard to find a way to send a present abroad and also very expensive. I thought about what I would like to get, what is interesting and easy. A gift comes from the heart but when you’re buying it from someone who is not your closest friend, you really:

1) do not want to spend so much money,

2) do not feel like buying something intimate (maybe you don’t know the person’s taste that much) and

3) still want to feel happy about what you are getting and hope this friend will appreciate it.

So I came with this idea. Getting them a Magazine subscription! Check out the magazine before in a bookstore or news stand. Check if it is not just full of ads and that it has interesting articles on the subject you’re picking.

Check on your friend’s Facebook page what her/his interests are. And you’ll make someone happy believe me.

Not so expensive and not too much efforts either.